Saturday

HOW TO SPOT AN INDIAN

* Everything you eat is savoured with garlic, onions and chillies.


* You try and re-use gift wrappers, gift boxes, and of course aluminium foil.


* You are standing next to the two largest size suitcases at the airport.


* You arrive one or two hours late to a party, and think it's normal.


* You peel the stamps off letters that the Postal Service missed to stamp.


* Your toilet has a plastic bowl next to the commode.


* All your children have pet names, which sound nowhere close to their real names.


* You talk for an hour at the front door when leaving someone's house.


* You load up the family car with as many people as possible.


* You use plastic to cover anything new in your house whether it's the remote control, VCR, carpet or new couch .


* You live with your parents even if you are 40 years old. (And they like it that way).


* If she is NOT your daughter, you always take interest in knowing whose daughter has run with whose son and feel it's your duty to spread the word.


* You only make long distance calls after 11pm.


* If you don't live at home, when your parents call, they ask if you've eaten, even if it's midnight.


* When your parents meet Indian for the first time and talk for a few minutes, you soon discover they are your relatives.


* Your parents don't realize phone connections to foreign countries have improved in the last two decades, and still scream at the top of their lungs while talking.


* You have bed sheets on your sofas so as to keep them from getting dirty.


* It's embarrassing if your wedding has less than 600 people.


* You list your daughter as "fair and slim" in the matrimonial no matter what she looks like.


* You're always interested to know/interfere in others' personal matters, what they are doing, where they are going, etc.


* You have really enjoyed reading this mail because you know some, or most of them, applies to you!

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