NOW PROBABLY EVERYONE WOULD HAVE GOT A LOT OF MAIL ABOUT THE US ATTACK
BUTI GUESS THIS ONE COULD BE CALLED THE HEIGHT OF ............... WHATEVER.
Osama had actually planned this for India and asked his "Managers" to study
the same. The "Managers" carried out a real time exercise to get to the
basics of it. But, as fate would have it, the results were frustrating for
Osama.
Days before 11/Sept, Osama had frustratingly thrown a report back on his
desk after he went thru, what can be said the outcome of the exercises
carried out by their "managers". Our spl. correspondent had somehow got the
chance to steal the following extract of the report:
Sir Osama,
Assalam Waliekum. We had carried out the exercise you asked us to do so. We
had targeted Qutub Minar in Delhi and we had very easily got into 5 Indian
Airlines Planes flying from mumbai, with our guns and grenades. But the
operations could not be carried out because
of the following reasons:
1) Plane 1: Did not take off. It developed Technical Diffculties.
2) Plane 2: Surprisingly the plane, after a 5 hour delay did take off
(thanks to Allah) but had a forced landing due to fuel shortage in Jaipur.
When investigated, we learnt that both the Pilots were Sardarjis who Came
late on Duty. As such they had started the plane on the runway, stepped out
of the cockpit and stood in front of the engine fans to dry their Hair. It
consumed half of the fuel.
3) Plane 3: It took off successfully despite, the Crew being on strike. We
were about to take over the aircraft when suddenly it started descending
steeply. On investigating we learnt that both the pilots were Punjabis and
were closely related. During some friendly chat they developed some
arguments over their parental property and when the matter got intense,
they started physical fighting leaving aircraft to Allah.
4) Plane 4: We had taken over the controls of the plane without any
bloodshed. We issued cheques of Rs.5,000/- each to the pilots who agreed to
jump out leaving the plane to us. They were bargaining for more and insisted
to be paid in cash to avoid taxation. The time lost in
bargaining cost us dearly as the plane got mistakenly diverted to
Afghanisthan.Upon investigation, we found that it happened due to error on
part of control tower and radar system while flying over Punjab, controlled
by two people named Mr. Santa and Mr. Banta Singh. We had to land safely in
Kandahar to avoid a tradegy on our own soil.
5) Plane 5: We tried again. But this time by mistake we had a passanger
named Mr. Laloo Yadav on Board. We don't know how he came to know about our
plans and came straight in to the cabin. Accusing us that we were
opposition's pawns, we were simply outnumbered by his co passengers who were
supposed to be his supporters. We were thrown out of the plane and right now
writing this report from Safdurjung Hospital. The situation is worse here
and nobody cares about us.
For Allah, please take us from here ..........please"
BUTI GUESS THIS ONE COULD BE CALLED THE HEIGHT OF ............... WHATEVER.
Osama had actually planned this for India and asked his "Managers" to study
the same. The "Managers" carried out a real time exercise to get to the
basics of it. But, as fate would have it, the results were frustrating for
Osama.
Days before 11/Sept, Osama had frustratingly thrown a report back on his
desk after he went thru, what can be said the outcome of the exercises
carried out by their "managers". Our spl. correspondent had somehow got the
chance to steal the following extract of the report:
Sir Osama,
Assalam Waliekum. We had carried out the exercise you asked us to do so. We
had targeted Qutub Minar in Delhi and we had very easily got into 5 Indian
Airlines Planes flying from mumbai, with our guns and grenades. But the
operations could not be carried out because
of the following reasons:
1) Plane 1: Did not take off. It developed Technical Diffculties.
2) Plane 2: Surprisingly the plane, after a 5 hour delay did take off
(thanks to Allah) but had a forced landing due to fuel shortage in Jaipur.
When investigated, we learnt that both the Pilots were Sardarjis who Came
late on Duty. As such they had started the plane on the runway, stepped out
of the cockpit and stood in front of the engine fans to dry their Hair. It
consumed half of the fuel.
3) Plane 3: It took off successfully despite, the Crew being on strike. We
were about to take over the aircraft when suddenly it started descending
steeply. On investigating we learnt that both the pilots were Punjabis and
were closely related. During some friendly chat they developed some
arguments over their parental property and when the matter got intense,
they started physical fighting leaving aircraft to Allah.
4) Plane 4: We had taken over the controls of the plane without any
bloodshed. We issued cheques of Rs.5,000/- each to the pilots who agreed to
jump out leaving the plane to us. They were bargaining for more and insisted
to be paid in cash to avoid taxation. The time lost in
bargaining cost us dearly as the plane got mistakenly diverted to
Afghanisthan.Upon investigation, we found that it happened due to error on
part of control tower and radar system while flying over Punjab, controlled
by two people named Mr. Santa and Mr. Banta Singh. We had to land safely in
Kandahar to avoid a tradegy on our own soil.
5) Plane 5: We tried again. But this time by mistake we had a passanger
named Mr. Laloo Yadav on Board. We don't know how he came to know about our
plans and came straight in to the cabin. Accusing us that we were
opposition's pawns, we were simply outnumbered by his co passengers who were
supposed to be his supporters. We were thrown out of the plane and right now
writing this report from Safdurjung Hospital. The situation is worse here
and nobody cares about us.
For Allah, please take us from here ..........please"
